Kim: Hello, my name is Kim and I’m a 40 year old.

Sounds like I’m at some kind of 40-something’s anonymous meeting and I’ve braved the first step to admitting I have some kind of disease! In some ways though, as I was approaching that dreaded milestone, that’s how I thought it was going to feel. However, having now survived the actual day of reckoning I’m realizing that I feel pretty much the same. The only difference is that I now have the benefit of hindsight and the wisdom that comes with a lifetime of consequences resulting from some fairly serious errors in judgment along the way. That old cliche’, “if only I knew then what I know now,” has taken on an entirely new meaning.

Gone are the days of worrying so much about what other people think. Not to say that I’m going to let myself turn into a slob or say disparaging statements without taking the feelings of others into consideration. However, if I am too tired or too busy or just plain don’t feel like doing something, I am going to politely decline without worrying so much about whether or not it’s going to piss them off. Chances are they will just go on with their day without giving it much thought. If when I see or talk to someone and they are in a bad mood, I’m not going to immediately think that I’ve done something to agitate them. I’m not going to be so worried when someone stares because maybe I have a hair out of place or a booger flake hanging from my nose (well, maybe I’d be a little worried about a booger) because they are probably not staring at anything in particular. My mom always used to stare at me and I’d ask her what the deal was and she’d just say she was using me as a thinking post.

Basically, I’ve come to the realization that it’s not all about me!

Julie: Well, I haven’t quite hit 40 yet. In fact, I have a little over 2 more years to go. I am NOT looking forward to being 40 and I am NOT going to leave my 30’s without a fight. As much as Kim says she feels the same, I ask, “The same as what?” Surely not the same as she felt when she was 30. Does she mean she feels the same as when she was 39 years and 363 days old? Well, duh.

Aging is totally a creeping-up-on-you thing. One day, you’re frolicking along the beach in a cute, teensy bikini, playing paddle ball and going to the bathroom without your cover up because you simply don’t even have to think about hiding your perfect ass. Then the next thing you know, and you have no idea how or exactly when this happened, you’re wearing a TANKini with a swim skirt, a big ridiculous hat, and hiding underneath your neon beach umbrella with your muu muu stuffed into your beach bag (next to all of your trashy magazines showing all of the best celebrity beach bods) in case you have to make a run for the bathroom because these bodily functions seem to occur more frequently and suddenly than they used to.

Ugh. I refuse to wear a swim skirt. I refuse to buy a muu muu. I refuse to get old. But I WILL keep wearing my cover up when running to the beach bathroom.

And as Kim would tell you, I pretty much have always said what was on my mind, and I’m pretty sure that when Kim mentioned that she would be careful and considerate of other people’s feelings when speaking her mind, she was thinking about me and my mouth diarrhea. Yep, things sometimes just leak out that shouldn’t.

But Kim, I am proud of you for at least recognizing your need to say no. It’s about freaking time. Just as long as you don’t say no to me, we’re all good.